Mabel's Grill - March 2015

The gang at Mabel's sit around talking about the dangers of sitting

The world’s problems are solved daily ’round the table at Mabel’s Grill.
“Thanks, you saved my life,” said Cliff Murray the other day when Molly Whiteside delivered his coffee at the morning session and Mabel’s Grill.
“You needed coffee that bad?” asked Molly.
“No, I needed a break from sitting getting my income tax stuff ready for the accountant,” said Cliff.
“You had that bad a year?” sympathized George McKenzie.
“No it was the sitting part not the income tax part,” said Cliff. “I saw this piece on TV the other day that said sitting will kill you.”
“Aren’t you sitting here?” wondered Dave Winston.
“That’s what my wife said when I told her I had to stop working on the income tax to come out for a coffee, but I explained the TV piece said you needed to get up and move around. If she really loved me and didn’t want me to die too early, she had to let me come out for coffee.”
“Hey Mabel, I guess you’re saving my life,” Molly called out to Mabel who was frying a serving of bacon and eggs at the grill. “You sure don’t do much sitting in this job,” she explained.
“Yeah, I’m saving you a trip to the gym,” Mabel called out. “Remember that added benefit of this job next time you’re thinking about asking for a raise.”
“I don’t know,” said George, “my granddad used to be on his feet all the time, walking behind the horses plowing, walking the fields stooking and then throwing sheaves onto the wagons at threshing. I remember him saying he was darned glad to get a tractor so he could sit down.”
“Bet he had real muscles on his legs with all that walking,” said Molly, with a twinkle in her eye.
“He did,” said George.
“And you guys got to big muscles on the part of your anatomy you use the most too,” she said with a giggle as she cast a glance at the guys posteriors before walking away.
“So what’s a guy supposed to do?” wondered Dave. “It’s not just the time you spend sitting on the tractor and the combine and the skid-steer, the business consultants are always saying you need to spend time in front of the computer keeping records so you can stay on top of productivity and your finances.”
“The piece I said showed people who have desks where they can stand up to work and walk on a treadmill,” said Cliff.
“I already feel like I’m on a treadmill when I’m doing the books,” said George. “Always running like heck and never getting ahead.”
“I got a friend who drives a grader for the township and they won’t let people stand up doing that anymore,” said Dave. “The labour ministry forced the grader manufacturers to make the cabs shorter on the equipment so the drivers couldn’t stand up because they liked working standing up and the inspectors thought they were risking their lives doing it.”
“So what, is the employer going to get in trouble now for endangering employees’ health because they have to sit down too much?” wondered George.
“Seems like whichever researcher can make the biggest noise gets to set the rules,” said Dave. “I mean one group of researchers is saying kids are getting fat because they sit on their fannies in front of television or computers or their phones but meanwhile in some towns, they’re banning kids from tobogganing in the parks because they might get hurt.”
“Bet the insurance companies are behind that one,” said Cliff. “Those guys will soon run the world.”
“How come nobody worried if we ran into something while we were tobogganing?” wondered Dave.
“Yeah, I never remember hearing about anybody being killed or paralysed for life, back then either,” said Cliff.
“Well you guys got harder heads than anybody I know,” said Mabel.
“And crash padding on the other end,” laughed Molly.◊