No chiff, choff or cherf here. Also, no chunt - The Chaff with Scott Stephenson

The Chaff has received a thoughtful, sincere and impressively well-organized critique from a member of our local business community regarding the general Chaffiness of The Chaff.

 

First things first: thank you.

 

Not everyone takes the time to explain why they think something is unnecessary. Most people simply close the page, shake their head, stare thoughtfully into the middle distance and quietly wonder how a collection of words escaped whatever facility was supposed to contain them. They may mutter something about the decline of civilization. They may question whether the printing press was a mistake. They may quietly hope that somewhere, somehow, a responsible editor will arrive with a broom and sweep the nonsense back into its proper container.

 

This gentleman did not do that. He took the time to respond. He communicated his concerns clearly. He explained his perspective. He made his position known without simply throwing tomatoes at the concept of The Chaff and walking away into the sunset. The Chaff respects that.

 

A thoughtful disagreement is a sign of a healthy community. In fact, it may be one of the most important signs. A community where everyone agrees on everything is not necessarily peaceful. It may simply mean everyone has fallen asleep in the same chair.

 

People bring different experiences, different expectations, different senses of humour and different ideas about what deserves attention. That is not a problem to be solved. That is part of what makes a community interesting.

 

A newspaper, at its best, is not just a place where people gather to confirm what they already believe. It is not merely a collection of comfortable opinions arranged neatly in rows, wearing tiny editorial neckties. It is a place where ideas meet, shake hands, debate, exchange business cards and sometimes bump into each other in the hallway and accidentally leave wearing each other’s coats.

 

That may be what happened here.

 

A meeting occurred between Serious Thought and The Chaff. Unfortunately, Serious Thought arrived carrying a briefcase full of thoughtful commentary, historical reflection, meaningful observations about society and perhaps a carefully organized folder labelled “Important Things Worth Considering.” The Chaff arrived carrying a kazoo, a notebook, a half-finished idea and a completely unnecessary sentence about something that probably should have been left alone.

 

Neither party was fully prepared.

 

It was the intellectual equivalent of a farmer bringing a perfectly maintained tractor to a parade and discovering The Chaff had arrived in a shopping cart with a tiny flag attached and absolutely no explanation for where the shopping cart came from. Both vehicles move. Both have their place. They simply have very different destinations.

 

The gentleman expressed concern about what might be called “Chaffy language.”

 

The Chaff understands.

 

Chaffy language is a peculiar substance. It does not follow traditional rules of usefulness. It cannot be measured with a tape measure. It cannot be placed into a spreadsheet. It cannot be assigned a quarterly objective or included in a strategic planning document.

 

It is not recommended by nutritionists. It does not improve your posture. It will not help you build a shed, repair a fence, balance a budget, negotiate a contract or make a responsible investment decision. In fact, if you attempted to use Chaffy language during a serious business transaction, there is a strong possibility someone would slowly lower their glasses, look over the top of them and ask if everything was okay.

 

And perhaps they should.

 

There are moments for seriousness. There are moments when we need clear information, careful decisions, practical solutions and people who know exactly what they are doing. The Chaff is not here to replace those things.

 

Chaffy language has one very specific purpose: it reminds us that while the world is serious, humans are wonderfully, spectacularly odd. We are the species that invented spreadsheets and then spent thousands of hours arguing about the best way to organize those spreadsheets. We created machines capable of seeing distant galaxies and exploring the edges of our world, and then used some of that same technology to argue with strangers about sandwiches.

 

The Chaff appreciates criticism. Not because every criticism is necessarily correct. Not because every critique should result in dramatic changes, emergency meetings and a committee formed to investigate the alarming presence of silliness. But because criticism means someone is paying attention. It means someone cares enough to engage.

 

Let’s build the Betty White statue together!